"With the goosebumpily gravel-voiced Alex Lambert and the adorably indie Lilly Scott inexplicably and tragically out of the running..."

"... this show is going to get so shark-jumpingly bad that it might as well be filmed on location at Sea World from now on."

Oh, come on. It's not that bad. First, "jumping the shark" doesn't mean getting dull. It means doing something desperately weird and out of keeping with what was good about a show. That's not this. Second, Paige Miles survived, thwarting the theory that Americans are racist. Third, Alex Lambert and Lilly Scott were low energy and they're responsible for their own low vote tabulation. Fourth, we already had a Lambert last year. Fifth, it's "American Idol." It's always been in large part about being kind of bad and loving somebody who doesn't deserve it and failing to appreciate somebody else who was better.