"At the nearby Trattoria del Castello, guests could order a 'Tom e Kat' - a basket of parmesan cheese with truffles and mushrooms."

So who's the truffle and who's the mushroom? I don't know, but I'm so relieved that now -- finally -- when the mushroomy/truffly Tom Cruise snuggles up in his baskety bed with his truffly/mushroomy Katie Holmes, that it will be with blessing of matrimony, sprinkled over them like Parmesan cheese. They traveled to Italy for this wedding, which didn't particularly tap into Italian tradition, since it was a Scientology wedding, where, I'm further relieved to see, the couple takes a vow "never to go to bed without communicating about any differences." I do hope this vow can be met with brief statements, otherwise every night becomes a talk fest, and what if you're really tired?

But here's the part about the Scientology wedding -- and having it in Italy -- that really gets me:

A spokesman for the Church of Scientology for Rome, Fabrizio D'Agostino, said an exchange of vows with a Scientology rite was not legally recognized in Italy, and would have to be preceded or followed by a civil union.

[Bracciano Mayor Patrizia] Riccioni said her office had not received a request to celebrate a civil wedding as of midday Friday.

Oh, for the love of... Hubbard! They aren't even getting married!!!

Can these two characters get off the public stage... perhaps by burrowing under a huge pile of shredded cheese?

UPDATE: According to the last line of this report of the wedding: "the couple had a legal civil ceremony before they left L.A., their publicists said."