"It is the most ridiculous contract in the world. It's just crazy."

That would be marriage, according to Simon Cowell.

"Without any legal advice you sign this binding contract and you are not sure where you are going to be in 10 years' time."

There's a lot of talk these days about all the legal benefits of marriage, but very little talk of all the disadvantages. When you get married, you don't want some damned lawyer bringing you down. You want to be surrounded by well-wishers in fancy clothes, celebrating you. Later, if things go wrong, as they do half the time, you'll have your lawyer, and he'll explain the shocking and drastic extent to which you invited the government into your personal life.