Talking to Google like it's your friend.

I'm constantly amazed (and amused) by the Google searches that bring people to this blog. (You know, I pay nothing to use Blogger, but I do pay by the month to have the premium service at Site Meter, which you need to have to see all the searches.) People write Google searches as if they were posing questions to a friend, a psychiatrist, or a Magic 8 Ball.

Here are some recent searches:

why am i attracted to fat womens bellys
i'm smart, goodlooking, and so why aren't i popular?

Then there are things like this:

what does it mean jewels and binoculars hang from the head of the mule

I come up second in a search for that. I've never given my opinion of what it means to say that "jewels and binoculars hang from the head of the mule." I kind of think Bob Dylan himself doesn't know. It sounds dirty though, doesn't it?