Backward! If there is one way to give a boring speech in Wisconsin, it is to start out with the observation that the state's motto is "Forward." Senator Kerry, I'm looking at you.

"The motto of the state of Wisconsin is 'Forward'," Mr. Kerry said. "And I want to thank the state of Wisconsin for moving this cause and this campaign forward tonight here in this great state."

That motto was thought up in 1851, which is approximately the year Kerry's rhetorical style was last in fashion.

I was about to give him credit for not festooning his speech with adjectives. I was going to say it must have been hard to resist saying "the great state" of Wisconsin. But then I glanced back up there and saw he didn't resist.

I wonder, what state isn't a "great state"? Can we ever get another adjective for a state? No? That's just great.