Madonna on Letterman.

Did you watch Madonna on Letterman last night -- complete with horseys? She was her usual stilted talk-show-self, and she looked weirdly shriveled inside a goofily high-collared purple sweater coat. I liked when she said "Is my necklace on straight?" as a way to get everyone to look at her breasts -- the necklace had a long dangling strand that could line up in her cleavage. And I liked when she tried to instruct Dave on how to toilet train his toddler and to shame him about letting the kid pass the two year mark without learning the highly prized skill. The Madonna technique: deprive the wayward lad of diapers and let him get disgusted with himself. Chances Dave will try that method? O.